


I've never felt this way for no one

by SrtaPepa



Category: Captive Prince - C. S. Pacat
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Fluff and Angst, Getting Back Together, Hurt/Comfort, Insecure!Laurent, M/M, My First Work in This Fandom, Not Beta Read, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Post-Break Up, Soft!Damen, but i try my best haha, english is not my first language
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-25
Updated: 2021-02-10
Packaged: 2021-03-16 07:56:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,922
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28827786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SrtaPepa/pseuds/SrtaPepa
Summary: After years together, Laurent decides to break up with Damen, hurting everyone around them. Too scared about the future they will have to face once He and Damen moved to different cities to study what they love, Laurent takes a drastic decision and ends the best thing that ever happened to him.One month crying in his bed is enough; things have to change. Or that's what Auguste thought.A week before Laurent move to Patras, the Vere family's older brother finds out that things weren't exactly like he was told. And maybe, Laurent has been lying to him about who broke up with who and why.Things had changed; the future was suddenly here knocking at his door, and so was Damen?
Relationships: Damen/Laurent (Captive Prince)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 44





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! How are you? I just want to say this one more time in case you guys didn't read it in the tags. 🚨 English is not my first language and I don't have a beta reader to help me 🚨 I totally understand if this is something that bothers you. Still thank you so much for clicking my fic. If you still here then, I'm kinda new to the fandom, nice to meet you! Hope you like it and see you soon.
> 
> Ps: Thank uuu soo much to the people who left kudos and bookmark this lil fic even without the first ch. I hope you guys like it 🌈💕

This could no longer be; Auguste had to do something before he and Laurent went crazy. It has been a month since his baby brother broke up with his boyfriend, who, to Auguste’s annoyance, used to be - still was? - his best friend. It was hard for him; not only he had to see his broken heart brother every day, but also he missed his best friends. 

Auguste had found himself thinking about them a few times a day. Watching his football team match was no joy for him now that he couldn’t joke with Nikandros and Damen. Fridays after offices weren’t the same without Nik and Damen. Fuck he was so cheesy these days that yesterday he almost text Damen this new meme he saw. He was about to press send when the date of the last he talked shook him. Still too sleepy to think, Auguste had forgotten he wasn’t talking with Damen. 

He felt miserable. It was like He had broken up with Damen instead of Laurent. And yes, of course, he also missed Nikandros, but Damianos was such a warm person between his friends and family. So easy going and genuinely happy about life. It was hard not to miss him, but it was also hard not to miss everything that came with having him in his life. 

But even after all of that, Auguste couldn’t deny that the person he missed the most was his brother. He and Laurent had always been close, but since Damen came into Laurent’s life last year, they had become inseparable. His baby brother was happy. He was finally opening to the people that he loved. Auguste didn’t remember the last time he saw his brother laugh so carefree. 

And now? Now it was even worse, Laurent barely left his room, barely spoke, not even to fight with him. It was like he didn’t even care. 

Auguste took one last puff of his cigar and came inside their house. Summer was about to end in not less than a week, Laurent was leaving him to live his dream. He had got a fantastic scholarship in Patras. His little Laurent was not so little anymore. 

Not entirely sure of what he was going to do, Auguste knocked on Laurent’s door. He was not spending his last week alone and sad in his room. Not if Auguste could do something about it.

“Come on, baby bro, let’s go outside for a bit,” Auguste said, almost begging, to the figure under the blankets. 

“I don’t want to go outside, Auguste. How hard is it for you to understand?” 

“Laurent, it’s been a month since…”

“Don’t.” 

“You need to move on. He doesn’t deserve it.” 

“Shut up! Shut up! You know nothing!” Laurent said, finally taking the blankets from his head. 

“He broke up with you to be able to fuck…” He stopped what he was saying, something in Laurent’s eyes. It wasn’t pain or anger. No, it looked like guilt? No. That was impossible. But maybe? it was Laurent who they were talking about at the end. “He broke up with you, right?” 

Silence.

“Laurent,” Auguste said, completely serious this time, “He broke up with you before leaving, right?” 

“I…” Laurent’s voice broke.

“No! No, please, brother, tell me you didn’t let me get mad and fight with my two best friends. Fuck! Nik tried to tell me. Fuck!” He was furious. “Laurent! I yelled the most awful things to both of them. To Da… to him! I… Oh my god! I told him he deserved what Jokaste and Kastor did to him, and he didn’t even try to defend himself.” 

“I never ask you to fight for me,” Laurent said, getting angry once again. 

“You didn’t need to! It was obvious I was going to take your side.” He took a deep breath. The last thing his brother needed was him yelling. “But if he didn’t. Then why? Why did you break up with him?” 

“I did what he was too cowardly to do.” 

Exactly what he thought. 

How could Auguste not realize it sooner? He knew Damen. The guy was the most honorable and Goodheart person Auguste had ever met. Shit! He was crazy in love with Laurent. He worshiped the floor his little brother walked over. How could he not see it? Damen wouldn’t want to start fucking other people so suddenly. Even if he had a history of sleeping around, he had never done it without the other knowing it. 

And when he met Laurent? Auguste would never forget the look in Damen’s eyes. 

“No, you did what you always do. Run, run as soon as something you want gets the slily harder.”Auguste said, looking into his brother. He was so young. Too young for all the things he had to go through. “You are the coward, Laurent. Not him. Love... love is never the easy choice, and yet He decided to love you. Against everything, people told him.” 

“Then he was a fool for not listening to them,” Laurent whispered, and he felt his heartbreak. 

Auguste moved to sit next to him on the bed. 

“You are the only fool and the coward here.” He said, unable to hold the truth. “Fuck! I need to call my best friend and beg for his forgiveness. You should too; maybe one day he would want us back again.” 

“Do you hate me?” Laurent asked so softly; Auguste almost missed it. 

“No,” He said before pulling his brother into a tight hug. “No, Laurent, I don’t hate you. And I’m so fucking sure He doesn’t hate you either. I know why you did it. It’s not an excuse to hurt people you love, but I understand. And because I do, I can’t hate you. Not even now.” He moved his head and kissed Laurent’s temple.“You’re young, baby brother. Take this as a lesson of what would happen if you keep pushing people off your life. I won’t be here at your side forever.” 

They hugged each other for a long time. 

Yet, he could not stop thinking about Damen. If Laurent was this hurt, how could Damen be? They were so in love, so happy, and from one day to the other, you are alone. With a broken heart without reason. With your best friend yelling at you. 

Auguste needed to talk to him, but maybe it was better if he called Nikandros first. Fuck! Nik was going to kill him. And maybe, maybe Auguste deserves it. 

Once he was alone in the kitchen, he called his other best friend. They hadn’t talked for a month; it was going to be hard. All of this if Nikandros ever picked up his call. 

“Nik, please let me explain,” Auguste said before he could speak. 

Nikandros stayed a whole minute in silence, and when Auguste was about to lose all his hopes, he talked for the first time.

“Okay, explain then,” Nikandros said, and he already felt better. 

………….

Laurent’s head was about to explode. He would have never known that a person could cry so much until last month. The worst part? He wasn’t sure he would be able ever to stop. 

Looking around his bedroom, Laurent made a short and simple plan. He needed to shower, clean his room, change his sheets. And change his clothes, he couldn’t keep wearing Da… - his heart sunk every time at the thought of his name. - his old football hoodie. Deciding to stand up, Laurent went to the kitchen. Nothing that a glass of water and some painkillers couldn’t solve. 

“I know, I know I fucked up. How? How is he?” He heard Auguste say from the living room. 

Laurent hesitated for a second. He could easily guess who his brother was talking to, but… He really really needed those painkillers. 

Fuck it! He was doing it. 

He tried to ignore what Auguste was saying, but it was so hard. It was like Laurent’s unconscious didn’t get the memo about his and Da… Their break up.

“He told me He broke up with him. Why? Mm… Well, I don’t remember.” Auguste was lying. Even now, he was lying for Laurent. Guessing that he wasn’t the only one lied to by Laurent, he decided to play dumb. Laurent loved his older brother at this moment, even if he was making him listening to Nikandro’s call. “Nik, he’s my little brother. Of course, I believe him. He could have told me the truth. I don’t know. Please Nik, I’m dying thinking of all the things I told him. Fuck, yes, maybe I deserve this. I just want to know how he is.” 

Laurent was leaving when he heard it.  _ His  _ name on Auguste’s lips. 

“Damen?” Auguste said, and he felt his heart stop. It was the first time in a month Laurent heard his name. “Nikandros, let me talk to him. Damen, please, I’m so so sorry.” 

A soft and gentle voice filled his room. “Hey Auguste,” Laurent looked up and saw his brother holding his phone like a speaker. “How are you doing, man?” 

His voice… his voice sounded so empty. The only time Damen had sounded like this was after Kastor and Jokaste betray. 

_ My brave and kind heart Damianos.  _ What have I done to you? 

Laurent wanted to cry. 

“Damen,” Auguste said, almost like a prayer, “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I feel so terribly after the things I told you that day. I didn’t mean it. Not even when I was saying it. I just wanted to hurt because…” His older brother stopped; he sounded ashame. 

“It’s okay,” Damen said, still so empty of any emotion. “I get why you did it, Auguste. I don’t blame you.” 

Auguste looked like he wanted to cry. He wasn’t the only one. 

“Damianos, if you could at least have the decency of being mad, this will be so much easier for me.” 

Damen snorted softly. “I’m sorry.”

Auguste groaned. “No, I am. I am sorry for ever letting you down.” 

“It’s okay.” 

Shaking his head, Auguste whispered. “You are too perfect, Damen.” 

“I don’t think so. If I were, he would have never…” He stopped and coughed. Laurent felt like he was dying. No! No! This was never meant to happen. Damen should have forgotten him by now. “I’m not perfect, but that’s okay.” 

“Damen” Auguste’s eyes were widened entirely. 

He had probably never heard Damen doubt of himself. Not that Laurent had heard him so much more. But some nights, when everything was dark and quiet, and they were holding each other, opening their hearts was easy. So they did it. They shared all their fears, all their secrets, all their dreams. 

It was beautiful. 

“Please not. Ignore it,” He begged.

Laurent was silently crying, holding himself hard, trying to stop his body from coming closer to Auguste. 

“I shouldn’t, but I guess that for only this time, I would do it.” 

“Thanks” 

They stayed in silence for a few long seconds, where Laurent could only hear his broken heartbeat. 

Damen took a deep breath like he was trying to be brave. And he wished, he wished he could be brave for him, for them. But Laurent wasn’t, not when it was about his feelings. 

“How is he?” Damen finally dared to ask.

“You don’t need to do this to you.” 

“Please, Auguste. I need to know. I need to know his fine.” How could kind words possibly hurt this much? “He was supposed to start next week. Is he excited?” 

Laurent already knew that he would never love someone else again. But maybe that was okay. No one would ever be enough after loving Damianos. Maybe loving him forever was better than just loving anyone else. 

“Oh, Damen!” Auguste cleaned a tear from his cheek. “Yes, he is. He’s a bit scared too. Even if he won’t admit it.”

At this moment, Laurent didn’t even care that his older brother was gossiping to the love of his life about how scared he was. 

“He shouldn’t. He is the best, and he earned his place there. I’m sure he is going to love it. ” Damen said, and for the first time, it felt like the ice in his voice had melted a bit. Like maybe he wasn’t as empty as he seemed. 

“Thank you,” Auguste responded for the both of them. 

Hopefully, Damen would know that. 

“Auguste?” 

“Yes?” 

“Could you…? Could you do me a favor?” 

“Of course. Just tell me, and if done. At this point, I’m even willing to get mad at him for you.” 

“No, please!” “He needs you.” 

“Don’t worry, he has me,” Auguste said before taking his phone to his ear and left Laurent crying in the kitchen.

Laurent didn’t get to know what Damen was going to ask his brother. Maybe it was for the best. Laurent worried that if he listened to Damen’s voice for one second more, he would have died from a broken heart. 

He wanted to beg and scream at his brother to make him come back. To let Laurent listen to Damen’s voice for a few more seconds. 

He didn’t. 

He wasn’t that strong, that brave. But also, he wasn’t that selfish. 


	2. Chapter 2

Laurent took the last few things from his bedroom, getting ready to leave. Ready to start a new chapter of his life far away from all the things that once made him happy but now only seemed to be bittersweet. He turned and was about to leave when he stopped. 

Looking at his bedroom, Laurent remembered Damen’s worried face as he told him they were over. There it was, the safest place to Laurent, for years. 

Now he only found an empty room. Now when he looked at it, he could only think of the heavy bags under his eyes, the sleepless nights, the longing. 

Sometimes, Laurent suspected he would never come to reasonable terms with it himself. How could he? How could he ever let go of Damen? Not entirely, at least, there was a part that lives in his memory that Laurent wasn’t sure he would ever want to let go. 

He hoped while he stared at the empty bedroom that It would get easy to pretend that part doesn’t exist.

It had been nearly a month, after all.

A text from Vannes took him out of his self-pity. _*Can’t wait for u to be here. We’ll have so much fun*_ Laurent had his doubts about that, but luckily her text gave him the willpower to leave his old room once and for all. 

_*Soon. I'm putting the last box in the car.*_ He texted back before blocking his phone. 

No one knew, but Laurent still had Damen’s photo as his wallpaper. He looked so cute and happy. There was no way Laurent would delete that photo. Not now, not ever. 

“Hey, baby bro, ready to go?” Auguste asked as soon as he left the box in the car trunk. 

“Kind of, maybe… I don’t know,” He said before he was pushed into his older brother’s arms in a tight hug that took all of his air. 

“You are going to be fine. You are the most intelligent, handsome, kind, loyal, cute…” 

“Auguste,” Laurent said, chuckling before his brother kept going. “I get it. I’m going to miss you too.”

He sighed. “I love you so much, baby bro. I’m so proud of you. Of the man and the person, you have become. I can't wait to see how much you grow and learn in your new life. Even if it kills me having to let you go.” 

“Crying eyes won’t make any good to my first time driving on the road.”

“No, you are right. I’m sorry,” Auguste said, ruffling his hair like when he was little, and Auguste was a whole head taller than him. 

“Before you leave, I have something for you. Just wait here” Auguste disappeared into the house before Laurent could answer him. 

He used the time alone to look at the front of the house. It looked the same as how he remembered it when he was seven years old and moved here. Lonelier maybe, at that time, it was still the four of them against the world. Sooner than later was just the three of them and then just Auguste and Laurent. Regretfully, Laurent thought of the not so brief time when they were not alone. That time when Damen became Auguste’s friends, and he hanged out here all the time. And then when he also started to hang out with Laurent. 

How happy have they been? Too much, probably because Laurent never gets to be truly happy for too long. 

“Here, this is for you” Auguste’s voice took him out of his mind when he appeared again. In his hands, he was holding a gift box. “He asked me to go to his place so I can give you this before you leave,” He explained. 

Laurent felt his body go warm and cold at the same time. Taking the box from his brother’s hands, he looked at it. It was a bit heavier than what he expected. The red and gold paper was a classic of Damen’s. He said that it was his personal mark for all of his things. 

Red for passion. Gold for Royalty. 

Laurent used to laugh at him for that, mocked him even about his ridiculous act as he was part of the royal family. Waiting to be crown King. 

“What is it?” He asked instead, too scared of opening it yet. 

Maybe he didn’t have to. Maybe it was better if he never got to know what was inside. 

“I don’t know, but he made me promise I will make you open it,” Auguste said like he could read his mind. After all those years, he probably could. “Damen said he bought it before you… Yeah. He said he didn’t get the chance to give it to you.” 

Before Laurent broke his heart for no reason, Damen had bought him something while they were happy. If he had doubts about opening it, now he was sure he didn’t want to.

It was more than just ‘want.’ 

Laurent was sure that whatever was inside of that box, he didn’t deserve it. Not anymore. And yet Damen had asked his brother to give it to him. 

But he knew he didn’t have an option. Auguste would never let him leave with opening the gift. He didn’t trust Laurent, and he did well. 

He took a deep breath and prepared himself for whatever was there for him. Laurent started to pull the golden string and then the red lid of the box. He placed both things in the capot of his car. 

Laurent bit his lip nervously at what he saw. It was a cute little crystal snowball; inside of it, you could see a spring landscape of Vere. Laurent held his breath for a moment when he noticed that there was a phrase engraved on it. 

“Shake me when you wish to come back home.” Laurent read out loud. 

He did it, and suddenly the perfume of the flowers from the back of his garden surrounded them. 

“How…” He said, utterly mesmerized when the unmistakable smell of the mixed flowers from his mother’s garden hit his nose. 

He wasn’t the only one astonished. Auguste’s eyes were bigger than ever, and his voice cracked a bit when he spoke. “Did he really put our garden’s flowers inside that thing... just for you?” 

“Yes, he did,” Laurent answered, his eyes once again glue to Damen’s gift. 

It was perfect. 

Like everything, Damen did for him. 

“Unbelievable,” His brother whispered after a few seconds where both of them went silent. “I’m regretting not dating him myself,” Auguste tried to joke. 

Laurent looked up at his brother and smiled softly. “Maybe you should.” 

.

.

.

Laurent ran a hand over his jaw, as he thinks, his face heating. What the fuck was he doing? Why was he calling Damen? Was he crazy? Had the long hours driving turn him mad? 

“Laurent?” Damen asked, snapping Laurent back to attention. “Is this really you?” 

“Yes,” He heard himself whisper. 

_‘I miss you.’_

“What’s going? Are you alright?” Damen asked quietly. He sounded genuine, like he really cared. 

_No, I’m not. And I would never be alright again. Knowing that you don’t love me anymore, that I would never feel the warmth of your gaze on me, the tender care of your lips, and the safety of sleeping in your strong arms._ Laurent thought but didn’t say. 

He wasn’t brave enough, and surely Damen didn’t need to hear of all his pathetic babbling. The gift only was proof of how much better a person Damen was, no that he wanted Laurent back. 

“Yes, I just want to thank you for the gift. It is very… considerate of your part. Give it to me after what I did.” he replied, his voice carefully even, devoid of emotion.

“Oh” 

The car filled with sudden, thick silence as Laurent tensed.

Now what?

“Did you…” Damen coughed, trying to get rid of his stutters. “Did you like it?” 

His heartbeat rose. 

“It was perfect,” Laurent answered, allowing himself a moment of pure honesty.

“Thanks,” He said back like he knew how hard it was for Laurent to admit things. 

It hadn’t. 

Not really. 

Nothing was hard to do when Laurent knew that it would make Damen happy. 

“Where are you now?” 

He shouldn’t answer. He already thanks Damen for the gift, and yet he was unable to do it. He needed to keep listening to that deep soft voice. 

“I…” Great! Now he was fucking crying.

“Laurent” 

“I’m driving to my new life,” He said between sobs. 

“That sounds amazing, lov...” Damen stopped before the endearment fully left his mouth. “You are living your dream, Laurent.” 

He scoffed, “I’m not so sure of that.” 

“Why? Did you forget to make your Elton John playlist?” Damen joked, his voice getting even softer than before. 

“You remember?” Laurent barely whispered while he wiped the tear falling down his cheeks. 

“Forever” 

“Damen,” He said hoarsely.

“I’m here.” 

“I can’t do it,” Laurent simply said. He didn’t explain what Damen knew; he always knew. 

“Of course you can. Laurent, you are one of the stronger people I know. If someone can do this is you. I know you can. I trust you.” 

“I… I can’t do this right now. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have called” 

_How could I be so selfish?_

_I need you._

“No, please. Laurent.” Damen begged, barely whispering like he was scared Laurent would hang up sooner if he spoke louder. “Please call me every time you need me.” 

“Goodbye, Damianos,” Laurent said and hung up before he could answer. 

Shit! He was so selfish; he didn't even ask Damen how he was. No, he couldn’t. He couldn't hear Damen saying that he was doing great, that he had finally moved on. That he didn’t love Laurent anymore. Shutting his eyes and trying to steady his racing heart. Frustration, anger, and just a little bit of I told you so! from his inner Auguste mingle inside him as admitting out that he fuck up. 

Wiping his tears, Laurent started to collect all the pieces of his heart once again slowly. When he felt good enough, he went back to the road. It was time to stop the crying and began to live his new life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for the wait! Hope you guys like this new chapter.. Thank you for the kudos 🌈💕

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Next ch we will have more of Damen and Laurent 😉😘  
> Stay safe!


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